Nearly everyone else up there is in reverse. Most of the planets capable of going retrograde are retrograde right now. Mercury retrograde takes the blame for everything, but there's no shortage of other planets you could point fingers at. Leave Mercury alone!

I'm kidding (mostly). But it's worth understanding what retrogrades are, because once you do, they become a lot less scary and a lot more useful.

Turbo jets on the track

Astronomically, most retrogrades occurs when Earth, moving along its orbit around the Sun, overtakes a slower planet. From our vantage point, that planet appears to move backwards. Picture being the fastest runner on the track: you fire up your Melissa Jefferson turbo jets and blow past everyone, and for a moment it looks like they're running in reverse. (There's a rap diss about retrograde in there somewhere. If you write it, give me some credit.) Once Earth pulls far enough ahead, the illusion fades and the planet goes direct again. Mercury and Venus are the exceptions, because they move faster than Earth. Their retrogrades happen when they pass between us and the Sun. From our angle, they look like they're going backwards.

So the backwards motion is a matter of perspective, which is also true of a lot of our problems.

The Sun and Moon never go retrograde. The lunar nodes are retrograde most of the time. And Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto spend so much of each year retrograde that we rarely stress about them. They're like living next to a train track, eventually you stop noticing.

Onset, diagnosis, recovery

Astrologers describe retrogrades in plenty of ways, but I'm partial to medical language. Shout out to Eileen Nauman for her influence here. She writes about midpoints specifically in the context of medical astrology, but I think the framework holds up for transits and broader contexts too.

In predictive work, when a transiting planet moves back and forth over a planet or point in your chart, the process tends to unfold in three stages:

1. The first direct pass is the onset. Shit hits the fan, though you may not fully register it yet.
2. The retrograde pass is the diagnosis. The issue surfaces completely, and you can finally see what you're dealing with.
3. The final direct pass is the culmination: stabilization, resolution, or healing.

Let's say you move into a new home. On the first pass, you catch a faint smell in the basement, but you're too busy to investigate. Between unpacking boxes and working the job that pays the mortgage, a weird odor downstairs isn't making the to-do list.

Then the retrograde hits, and the smell takes over the bottom floor. That's when you discover your hoarder neighbor has a cat colony, and a few of them have slipped over to your place to live out their final days in peace, until whatever they caught at the hoarder house finally catches up with them. Your basement is now kitty corpse central, and the cleanup is yours. So you get to work.

By the time the direct pass comes back around, your basement is spotless and ready for that rental unit you've been daydreaming about. Your neighbor landed on Hoarders, got help from the show's psychologist, and is keeping the house clean. (Side note: a friend of mine used to work on Hoarders, and I asked him why he never went to set. Lolololol. He just glared at me.)

That middle stage is where avoidance stops being an option. The source of the stank has been exposed, and you've got to get your shit together. To me, it resembles a quincunx: two things that don't fit keep grinding against each other until you make an adjustment, because ignoring them no longer works. It's uncomfortable, but a diagnosis names the problem so you can treat it. That's the purpose of the retrograde pass.

One more thing: when a planet stations (pauses before turning retrograde or direct) right on one of your natal planets, that natal planet lands under a spotlight, and its themes dominate for the duration. If Mercury stations on your Venus, your relationships and finances move to the front of the line.

So what do you do with all this?

Ask what's being diagnosed. Something likely started showing up a while back, and now it's coming into focus. Don't rush to the cure. Treat the retrograde as a period for taking stock: notice what keeps resurfacing, which conversations keep circling back, and where your body is asking you to slow down. Then make the fix on the final pass, once you know what you're fixing.

And if something feels off physically, call your doctor. Astrology can point you to the right room; your doctor handles what's inside it. Drink some water while you're at it.

Big Deck Energy

Welcome to Big Deck Energy—where I pull a card each week on behalf of our collective to offer insight, reflection, or a much-needed reality check. Think of it as a weekly reset, a moment to pause and take in what’s unfolding. This week, I asked: What old issue is resurfacing, and what does it need from us now?

The card: the Page of Cups.

This card is about taking what you feel and dream up and doing something real with it. When the Page of Cups shows up as an old issue resurfacing, that last step isn't happening. The feelings and ideas are there, but for whatever reason, they aren't making it into the real world.

For some of us, it shows up creatively. The ideas keep coming, but they live in your Notes app and never make it any further. (I currently have 40-something video ideas in mine. No judgement here, boo.) Leave the Muses on read long enough and they'll stop texting first, which is how you end up feeling dry and uninspired.

For others, it's emotional. You know what you feel, but it never makes it out of your mouth, so it comes out sideways. Suddenly you're furious at your partner because the forks went in the dishwasher tines down, or you're exhausted after a day where, technically, nothing happened.

What this card asks of you now is to close that gap. Write the idea down before you talk yourself out of it. Put 20 minutes on the calendar and protect it. Say the thing to the person instead of rehearsing it in the shower for the 14th time, complete with a rebuttal to their rebuttal. Build a routine that doesn't depend on whether you feel like it. And be nice to yourself while you do it, because you can't bully the Muses into coming back. They want the soft life and right now you’re inviting them to a bando.

Stage two of a retrograde shows you what's stuck. The Page of Cups says get it moving. 🫖

Your chart, your timeline

With this many planets retrograde, a lot of us are in the diagnosis phase of something. A reading shows you which retrogrades are hitting your chart, which stage you're in, and when the final direct pass arrives, so you're not left guessing at the timeline. If you feel stuck in the middle of something, now is a good time to look. I've got some new offerings and pricing.

​Book a reading​

Thanks for spending part of my birthday with me. 🫶🏾